Welcome once again, gentle reader, to the glamorous showbiz highlight of the year, the announcement of the annual Chrisparkle Awards for 2023. Eligibility for the awards means a) they were performed in the UK and b) I have to have seen the shows and blogged about them in the period 10^th January 2023 to 9^th January 2024. Are you all sitting comfortably? Then we’ll begin!

The first award is for Best Dance Production (Contemporary and Classical)

This includes dance seen at the Edinburgh Fringe, which is just as well as we only saw four dance productions this year and they were all in Edinburgh! These are the top three:

In 3^rd place, the amusing association of inventive contemporary dance with wine tasting, in Geelong’s Attitude Dance Company’s Perfect Pairing: A Wine Tasting Dancegustation at Greenside at Infirmary Street, Edinburgh, in August.

In 2^nd place, the stunning The Rite of Spring / common ground[s], as performed by members of the Pina Bausch Foundation and Ecole des Sables, at the Edinburgh Playhouse in August.

In 1^st place, the double bill of short dances including Revelations, performed by the Alvin Ailey Dance Theater at the Festival Theatre, Edinburgh, in August.

Classical Music Concert of the Year.

For the second year running, we only saw one classical concert this year – Sinfonia Viva’s Beethoven’s Symphony No 3 at the Royal and Derngate, Northampton, in July. It gets an honorary mention, but if I don’t get to see more classical concerts in 2024 this award may have to be withdrawn!

Best Entertainment Show of the Year.

This means anything that doesn’t fall into any other categories – for example pantos, circuses, revues and anything else hard to classify. Here are the top three:

In 3rd place, the always delightful Sheffield pantomime, Beauty and the Beast at the Lyceum Theatre, Sheffield, in December.

In 2^nd place, with the most extraordinary set of production values and so much cash chucked as it, the amazing Peter Pan at the London Palladium in December.

In 1^st place, so good we saw it twice, the deliciously hilarious Mother Goose starring Ian McKellen and John Bishop at the Festival Theatre, Chichester, in February and the Curve Theatre, Leicester, in March.

Best Standup of the Year.

Star standup comedians were thin on the ground this year so the Committee has decided to group the Star Standup and Local Screaming Blue Murder/Comedy Crate standup awards together into one major award for best standup comedian. 41 comics made the longlist, of which 10 made the shortlist – and here are the top five:

In 5th place, the gifted physical comedian Addy van der Borgh (Screaming Blue Murder – May)

In 4^th place, the explosively unpredictable President Obonjo (Comedy Crate – October)

In 3^rd place, deadly material subtly delivered by the brilliant Sarah Keyworth (Comedy Crate – September)

In 2^nd place, a fantastic new find, Thomas Green (Comedy Crate Weekender – July, Comedy Crate – December)

In 1^st place, the comedy powerhouse that is Tom Stade (Comedy Crate Edinburgh Preview – July)

Best Musical.

I saw twelve musicals this year, a combination of new shows and revivals. One big disappointment, one that everybody else loves but I don’t, and a few slightly underwhelming, but that leaves a strong top five.

In 5th place, hard to do a bad production of this, but nevertheless it was a delight, The Sound of Music at the Festival Theatre, Chichester, in September.

In 4^th place, a wonderfully intimate production of a challenging show, the beautiful Pacific Overtures at the Menier Chocolate Factory, London, in December.

In 3^rd place, a show that was way better than it had any right to be, the touring production of The Cher Show at the Royal and Derngate, Northampton, in January.

In 2^nd place, the funny, endlessly surprising, and beautifully performed show that fully deserves a transfer, Close Up, the Twiggy Musical, at the Menier Chocolate Factory, London, in October.

In 1^st place, outstanding in every respect, Nicholas Hytner’s extraordinary promenade production of Guys and Dolls, at the Bridge Theatre, London, March.

Best New Play.

Just to clarify, this is my definition of a new play, which is something that’s new to me and to most of its audience – so it might have been around before but on its first UK tour, or a new adaptation of a work originally in another format. We saw eighteen new plays this year, but I only awarded five stars to two of them; is the standard getting worse or am I getting tougher?!

In 5^th place, Amy Herzog’s funny and emotional look at the oddest of odd couples, 4000 Miles, at the Minerva Theatre, Chichester, in June.

In 4^th place, a delightfully in-your-face, challenging and very funny new take on an old genre, Charlie Josephine’s Cowbois, for the Royal Shakespeare Company at the Swan Theatre, Stratford-upon-Avon, in October.

In 3^rd place, a fascinating examination of south-east Asian stereotypes on stage, Kimber Lee’s untitled f*ck m*ss s**gon play at the Young Vic, London, in October.

In 2^nd place, Isobel McArthur’s hilarious reworking of Jane Austen’s classic, Pride and Prejudice* (*sort of) at the Festival Theatre, Chichester, in February.

In 1^st place, a gripping account of the meeting of two very different artistic minds, Jack Thorne’s The Motive and the Cue at the National Theatre Lyttelton Theatre, London, in May.

Best Revival of a Play.

I saw thirteen revivals, of which only one was a disappointment; here’s the top five:

In 5th place, the RSC’s climate-change led production of Shakespeare’s The Tempest at the Royal Shakespeare Theatre, Stratford-upon-Avon, in February.

In 4^th place, the remarkable updating of the story of Shylock to 1930s London in The Merchant of Venice 1936, at the Swan Theatre, Stratford-upon-Avon, in September.

In 3^rd place, breathing new life into a truly vibrant production of this modern classic, Michael Frayn’s wonderful Noises Off, at the Phoenix Theatre, London, in March.

In 2^nd place, Headlong’s brilliantly pared back and taut production of Shakespeare’s Henry V, at the Royal and Derngate Theatre, Northampton, in March.

In 1^st place, the production that made you wonder why this brilliant play isn’t performed more often, Gregory Doran’s superb production of Shakespeare’s Cymbeline, for the Royal Shakespeare Company at the Royal Shakespeare Theatre, Stratford-upon-Avon, in May.

As always, in the post-Christmas season, it’s time to consider the turkey of the year – and whilst I was unimpressed with both The Inquiry at Chichester, and The Enfield Haunting at the Ambassadors Theatre, London, the worst thing I saw all year was the RSC’s Julius Caesar at Stratford’s Royal Shakespeare Theatre.

Now we come on to our four categories specifically for the Edinburgh Fringe. The first is:

Best play or musical – Edinburgh

I would normally have included musicals in with the “Best of the Rest” category, but I feel it is more appropriate to include them in the “Best Play” category.

We saw 89 productions of plays and musicals in Edinburgh this year, 19 of them got 5* from me, and here are the top 5:

In 5th place, the gripping and emotional account of the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory Fire in New York in 1911, Paved with Gold and Ashes, written by Julia Thurston and produced by ThreeDumb Theatre (Greenside @ Infirmary Street)

In 4th place, the fascinating, moving and extremely sad story of the life of Lena Zavaroni, Lena, written by Tim Whitnall and produced by Feather Productions (Assembly George Square)

In 3rd place, a constantly surprising and thrilling one-man play that explores football fandom and mental health, Why I Stuck a Flare up my Arse for England, written by Alex Hill and produced by Roxy Dog (The Space @ Niddry Street)

In 2nd place, a scintillating and harrowing account of sexual abuse within a family, The Good Dad (A Love Story), written by Gail Louw and produced by And Tomorrow (The Space @ Surgeon’s Hall)

In 1st place, the cream of this year’s Edinburgh crop, the brilliantly written, superbly performed and remarkably thought-provoking, Public – the Musical, written by Stroud/Sands/Stroud and produced by Stroud and Notes (Pleasance Courtyard)

Best Individual Performance in a Play or Musical – Edinburgh

As always, an impossible choice, and you cannot get a cigarette paper between the top two. Nevertheless, here are the top five:

In 5^th place, Tim Hardy for The Trials of Galileo (Greenside @ Infirmary Street)

In 4^th place, Annabel Marlow for Public – The Musical (Pleasance Courtyard)

In 3^rd place, Andrew Patrick-Walker for Public – The Musical (Pleasance Courtyard)

In 2^nd place, Sarah Lawrie for The Good Dad (A Love Story) (The Space @ Surgeon’s Hall)

In 1^st place, Alex Hill for Why I Stuck a Flare up my Arse for England (The Space @ Niddry Street)

Best stand-up comedy show – Edinburgh

We saw thirty-nine stand up shows this year, but only eight received 5* from me, and here are my top five:

In 5^th place, a cracking show based on advice to her 14 year old self, Sooz Kempner with her Y2K Woman show (Underbelly Bristo Square)

In 4^th place, the frenetic and intense Glenn Moore with his Will You Still Need Me, Will You Still Feed Me, Glenn I’m Sixty Moore show (Pleasance Courtyard)

In 3^rd place, a show that mines comedy gold out of awkwardness, the hilarious Robin Grainger with his An Audient with Robin Grainger show (The Stand Comedy Club 2)

In 2^nd place, a master at work delivering a true masterclass of brilliance from the word Go, Frank Skinner with his 30 Years of Dirt show (Assembly George Square)

In 1^st place, who am I to disagree with the people behind the Edinburgh Award for Best Comedy Show, Ahir Shah with his truly beautiful Ends show (Monkey Barrel Comedy)

Best of the rest – Edinburgh

From a shortlist of eleven, here are my top five:

In 5th place, the sumptuous musical nostalgia of Gertrude Lawrence: A Lovely Way to Spend an Evening, performed by Lucy Stevens and produced by Penny Mayes (Assembly Rooms)

In 4th place, the childlike escapism of pretending to be a war hero with Sam Dugdale’s hilarious creation Manbo (Underbelly Cowgate)

In 3rd place, part standup, part play, part lecture, part eulogy, the wonderful and indefinable Ben Target: LORENZO (Summerhall)

In 2nd place, an outrageous laugh from start to finish, the delightfully irreverent Diana: The Untold and Untrue Story with Linus Karp as the late Queen of Hearts (Pleasance Dome)

In 1st place, one of those chilling theatrical experiences that only Edinburgh can truly create, Edwin Flay’s astonishing performance in The Quality of Mercy: Concerning the Life and Crimes of Dr Harold Frederick Shipman (The Space @ Surgeon’s Hall)

There were three contenders for this year’s Edinburgh turkey; Gold was a terribly unfunny and embarrassing play based on the Brinks-Mat robbery, and Rahul Somia’s Find me a Wife stand up show was woefully unprepared. However, the direst thing we saw was York University Drama Society’s crass and tasteless waste of an opportunity to stage the argument between Tynan and Ionesco in The Courteous Enemy (The Space @ Surgeon’s Hall). Truly dreadful.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Musical.

Time to get personal. Here’s the top five:

In 5^th place, Hannah-Jane Fox as Nellie Hornby in Close Up at the Menier Chocolate Factory, London, in October.

In 4^th place, Celinde Schoenmaker as Sarah Brown in Guys and Dolls at the Bridge Theatre, London, in March.

In 3^rd place, Debbie Kurup as Star in The Cher Show at the Royal and Derngate, Northampton, in January.

In 2^nd place, Elena Skye as Twiggy in Close Up at the Menier Chocolate Factory, London, in October.

In 1^st place, Marisha Wallace as Miss Adelaide in Guys and Dolls at the Bridge Theatre, London, in March.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Musical.

Here’s the top five:

In 5^th place, Steven Serlin as Norman Hornby in Close Up at the Menier Chocolate Factory, London, in October.

In 4^th place, Cedric Neal as Nicely-Nicely Johnson in Guys and Dolls at the Bridge Theatre, London, in March.

In 3^rd place, Jon Chew as The Reciter in Pacific Overtures at Menier Chocolate Factory, London, in December.

In 2^nd place, Ian McIntosh as Deco in The Commitments at the Royal and Derngate, Northampton, in April.

In 1^st place, Daniel Mays as Nathan Detroit in Guys and Dolls at the Bridge Theatre, London, in March.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Play.

Sixteen in the rather long shortlist, and here’s the top five:

In 5^th place, Tuppence Middleton as Elizabeth Taylor in The Motive and the Cue, National Theatre, Lyttelton Theatre, London, in May.

In 4^th place, Mei Mac as Kim in untitled f*ck m*ss s**gon play, Young Vic, London, in October.

In 3^rd place, Felicity Kendal as Dotty Otley in Noises Off, at the Phoenix Theatre, London, in March.

In 2^nd place, Tracy-Ann Oberman as Shylock in The Merchant of Venice 1936, at the Swan Theatre, Stratford-upon-Avon,in September.

In 1^st place, Eileen Atkins as Vera in 4000 Miles, at the Minerva Theatre, Chichester, in June.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Play.

Fourteen contenders in my shortlist, and here is the top five:

In 5th place, Roger Allam as Frank in Frank and Percy, at the Theatre Royal Windsor, in June.

In 4^th place, Greg Wise as Tobin in Never Have I Ever, at the Minerva Theatre, Chichester, in  September.

In 3^rd place, Ian McKellen as Percy in Frank and Percy, at the Theatre Royal Windsor, in June.

In 2^nd place, Johnny Flynn as Richard Burton in The Motive and the Cue, National Theatre, Lyttelton Theatre, London, in May.

In 1^st place, Mark Gatiss as John Gielgud in The Motive and the Cue, National Theatre, Lyttelton Theatre, London, in May.

Congratulations to the winners, commiserations to the losers and thanks for your company again throughout the year, gentle reader. Here’s to a happy and rewarding 2024 full of artistic excellence!