Estrid Barton Archives - The Real Chrisparkle

It was with no little excitement that I realised this touring production comes from the Middle Ground Theatre Company, an intrepid outfit that brought a couple of excellent productions to the Wycombe Swan in the mid-1990s and whom I always enjoyed seeing. Small, but beautifully formed, as they say; Middle Ground would tour where angels fear to tread, including the Scottish Highlands and Islands, bringing their productions to remote village halls for one night only.

And that is the rather charming and potentially hilarious inspiration for Margaret May Hobbs’ new play Dial M for Mayhem, the story of a bumbling company performing Dial M for Murder for one night at the Loch Shindig Village Hall (no need to look it up; you won’t find it on any map). Pouring rain, a clapped-out van, food poisoning, an accident-prone actor, an escaped pet rat, electricity via a 50p meter – I probably don’t need to go on. But will the show?

Michael Lunney’s set perfectly encapsulates that often seen, rather basic, flimsy touring set whilst still serving the purpose of the play extremely well, allowing an Act Two backstage view whilst still being able to see some of what’s going on “on stage”. The cast work their socks off, full of commitment and with plenty of physical comedy. There are some extremely funny scenes which genuinely make you laugh out loud – and there’s no doubt that the show received a good reception. The biggest laugh from a Northamptonshire audience came from the revelation that one of the Scots characters doesn’t come from Loch Shindig – but Corby.

So is this the new Noises Off? Far from it, I’m afraid. For every funny moment there are several tumbleweed sequences where everything just treads water. The patchy writing extends to the structure of the play itself; only the third scene (of four) gives you the backstage angle with all its unique comedy potential, and much of that sadly falls flat. This leads on to a final scene which partially resolves a few issues – even though you didn’t realise they were issues in the first place. Two members of the team have a brief romantic moment without ever having seen a flicker between them in the first three scenes. You suspect that another character has some unspecified health issues that just brings a cloud to the final few minutes.

Margaret May Hobbs doesn’t sign off her scenes with any significant line or cliffhanger moment to take us to the next scene, resulting in them all finishing hanging in the air, with the audience wondering is that it? At least half the characters are stereotypes with precious little depth to them; the AA man is like a Scouse Eric Morecambe and there’s a stock Highlander who would make the characters in Hamish Macbeth blush with embarrassment. There’s also no sense of urgency or panic in the last minute rehearsals for the performance; Sean the director and Andrew the stage manager allow themselves to be merrily distracted from getting on with the job without the remotest concern. And when we see Dial M for Murder in full flow from backstage, there’s no sense of it progressing whilst we’re watching the backstage catastrophes; the Loch Shindig audience may be as generous as you like but even they can’t be happy with several minutes of nothing happening on stage whilst everyone hunts down a rat.

Michael Lunney’s cast make the most of their roles; Alasdair Baker as Rupert mines a genuine fallen star out of the stereotype elderly luvvie, and I enjoyed Estrid Barton’s Ellen frantically trying to hold the sound cues together whilst simultaneously throwing up in a bucket. But, sadly, a weak script means you come away from the show with a sense of opportunities wasted rather than taken. After its week in Northampton, the tour continues to Darlington, Dundee, Ipswich and Hereford.