Eurovision 2020 – the show that never was – Semi Final Two

EurovisionWelcome back to the second part of our home-grown Eurovision Song Contest for 2020. In the absence of any Rotterdam-action, we thought, hey why not just do the show right here in the barn? Last week 25 of you (merci bien) voted on the songs in the first semi-final and this week it’s time to present the songs in the second semi-final. All of course under the vigilant eye of Snowdrop the Psychic Bear who no doubt will be a pain in the backside once more.

SnowdropAs noted for the first semi, the order of performance was never fully agreed before International Lockdown, just the songs that are to be aired in the first half or the second half of the show, so it’s up to Snowdrop to employ his psychic powers to decide the running order.

Snowdrop has decreed that the honour of opening the show goes to Natalia Gordienko for Moldova with her song, Prison.

Attracted by the title, Freaky, Snowdrop’s next choice is Senhit, for San Marino.

Snowdrop is rubbing his temples again, this never ends well. Next up is Alicja, with Empires, for Poland.

Estonia next, with Uku Suviste and What Love Is.

Snowdrop’s not happy. He says he’s still waiting for a decent song. I couldn’t possibly comment. Next up is Greece, with Stefania and Superg!rl (yes, that exclamation mark is particularly annoying.)

Snowdrop’s next selection is the Czech Republic. Wasn’t there a better arrangement of this earlier? he asks me. I say, yes, but it’s not for you to take sides. Here’s Benny Cristo with Kemama.

Snowdrop just popped out to do his shopping (it is allowable, even under lockdown), and it’s all frozen food. That can only mean one thing. Next up is Iceland, with Think About Things by Daði og Gagnamagnið.

Two songs to go before the break, and the first is Hurricane for Serbia, with their song Hasta la Vista. Yes, Snowdrop, there are two other Eurovision songs with that title. Proper little know-it-all, that bear.

Rounding off the first half, it’s Alive for Austria, sung by Bruno Mars. I mean, Vincent Bueno. So easy to get the two mixed up.

So now it’s time for my traditional attempt to blag my way into the Green Room with a fake London Eurovision Party VIP pass (you never know, it could work) to have a quick word with some of this year’s contestants.

So, Senhit, welcome back to Eurovision after a gap of nine years. How does it feel to be back in the bubble?

Senhit: FREAKY!

I see, it’s going to be like that again, is it? Alicja, this is odd, it looks as though you’ve brought a stack of movie magazines into the Green Room with you… what are they?

Alicja: EMPIRES!

Jeez I had to ask. Uku Suviste, let’s test you on your Eurovision General Knowledge. What are the last four words of the chorus to Vikki Watson’s 1985 entry for the UK?

Uku Suviste: That’s….WHAT LOVE IS? Correct!

Enough frivolity. Now it’s back to the serious question of selecting our ten finalists from the eighteen in this year’s second semi-final. Over to you, Snowdrop; and we’re starting the second half with one of the favourites, it’s Victoria, with Tears Getting Sober, for Bulgaria.

Snowdrop’s now getting ready for his sauna, which must mean it’s time for Finland, and Aksel with Looking Back.

A sauna always makes Snowdrop emotional – I’m presuming that’s the reason he’s getting his hanky out. Clearly in preparation for Gjon’s Tears for Switzerland and Répondez-moi.

I’m getting tired of this bear’s dramatics. Now he’s recreating the story of Icarus and Daedalus. I guess that must mean it’s time for Albania, and Fall from the Sky by Arilena Ara.

He’s just opened a bottle of ten-year-old tawny, so I forgive him – provided he shares it. Time for Portugal, clearly, and Medo de Sentir, by Elisa. Apologies for the fact this isn’t the official video, for some reason WordPress is allergic to that link.

Oh, For Heaven’s Sake. Now he’s drunk. Do you want me to talk like an Englishman, he just asked, belligerently. No, Snowdrop, I don’t want you to talk at all. Ah, I see, he’s now chosen Georgia, and Take me as I am, by Tornike Kipiani.

It’s a bit embarrassing when he gets like this because it brings out his BDSM side. He’s now asking me to put the chains on him, which I’m hoping is the code for Armenia’s song by Athena Manoukian.

He really has drunk way too much. In fact, he’s collapsed in the corner. I supposed I’d better go and find out if he’s still breathing, which coincidentally is the title of the next song by Samanta Tina for Latvia.

One song left, and whilst you listen to Denmark’s entry, YES (in emphatic capitals) by Ben and Tan, I’m going to ring 111 to see what they recommend I do about this bloody bear.

And there you have it. All you now have to do is make your top ten selection from these songs and send me your decision, in the traditional 12 points to your favourite, 10 points to the second, 8 points to the third and so on. If you can, email me at – or send me a DM on Facebook. Two super-keen voters on the first semi-final also sent me their votes for this selection, so they have already been added to the master spreadsheet. If you enjoyed voting last time, please feel free to give this lot your consideration. And if you didn’t vote last time, then rise like a phoenix, recognise to your civic duty and vote this time. You’ve got until midnight (UK time) on Sunday April 19th to finally face your Waterloo.

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